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Wednesday 14 December 2011

10 Top Ways to Make Money Online

At a time when the economy is showing little sign of improving and interest rates are remaining low, it is now not so profitable to earn interest on any money you happen to be sitting on. Instead of growing our capital we're having to invest it into something risky in order to get a return. E-Commerce is probably the biggest marketplace in the World, in fact nowadays it's uncommon for a high street store not to have a website. Now, if you ask me it's pretty hard to make money online but it can be done and I've made a small amount of money online myself *Smiles at my Ebay account*. But this post is all about you, find ways to save money and create a revenue stream online!

10. Private Coaching Online


The potential is there and everyone wants to be coached in some way. Take life coaching for example after I quick search on Google I found this site http://www.uklifecoaching.org/. It's a site advertising life coaches, I mean a lot of people feel they need some sort of life coaching and i'm sure people would pay for it. You can also do other things i'm sure, if you have a specific attribute that you are qualified to coach then why not do it privately for people online?

9. Ebooks


Ebooks are becoming more and more popular and some people are even scared paper and ink will become obsolete! Heaven forbid! I'm an English student, it would be the end of my world but hey-ho! The idea is that if you write something and post it online and perhaps, even offer a sample...if people like the material they will buy it. Who knows, if you write well enough Amazon may come along, knocking on your door asking for exclusive material. It's unlikely but if you do it for a number of years and become quite popular in selling ebooks, who knows. The great thing about E-Commerce is there's always room for expansion as everything is virtual...

8. Online Surveys


There's a few genuine sites which are quite handy when you want to earn a couple of pounds. If you spend 15 minutes filling out a survey and get paid a pound or whatever for doing it, that isn't too bad and the workload isn't exactly strenuous. One site I use is http://www.valuedopinions.co.uk/ which I don't get paid money for per say, but I do get given vouchers when I reach the £10 mark which is ideal for saving money on Amazon when I need to pay for books for my tuition. There are others too which offer cash instead but obviously, you have to be careful when there are so many scammers around...

7. Blogging


Ok, i'll be honest, I haven't made any money since i've started blogging (About a month ago, maybe a bit less) but the point is it can be done. If you have something to talk about that is interesting and in some way funny you can blog it and gain readers. After a while you can start to employ advertisements on your blog and hey! You over there, Mr. Presto...you've got a way to make money. Some people are known to have retired off and live off of their blog money so who knows.

6. Selling Services Provided By Others


Be the middle man, have people advertise their services on your website and charge them a commission. This means the only workload you have is the start up and maintaining of the website, you don't provide services yourself but get paid for others providing services. It's quite simple but easier said than done, that's for sure.

5. Provide Your Own Services


Yeah, go one step better and actually sell yourself...no, not prostitution, well, not sexual prostitution anyway. If you have a particular skill and can show you're qualified, it may be DIY, it may not, it doesn't matter. The point is you can sell your services through online websites.

4. Sell Products on Your Website


This is relatively simple, perhaps you sell flowers. Why not sell them online, it's a bad example but there are millions of people who sell stuff online.

3. Forums and News Boards


Sell products in forums or on news boards. Now this can be done through websites such as http://www.friday-ad.co.uk/ who are cheap, and free if you sell your item for less than £50. Another site is http://www.gumtree.com/ which as far as i'm aware is totally free. The idea is that these websites get so many visitors that instead of setting up your own website, you might as well use them instead of spending money promoting your own website.

2. Sponsorship


On your website, when it becomes reasonably popular and you have a decent stream of income you might be able to find some sponsors that will pay you to advertise on your site. There are thousands of websites willing to do this if your traffic is good enough and is significantly more effective than Google's Adsense.

1. Ebay


Yeah, the best way to make money still remains Ebay. With so many visitors it's so easy to sell things. I've done it myself on a number of occasions and have had great success. Even if it's just old stuff you consider junk! They'll be some crazy person willing to buy it. There's even a way to set up you own Ebay store so you can essential become a part of the retailing industry.

So, what are you waiting for? Here are the methods, go make some money...and occasionally pop back here to update me on how you're doing :D

Monday 12 December 2011

10 Best Oscar Wilde Quotes

Oscar Wilde was brilliant and I will be doing a follow up post on Dorian Gray very soon, in the meantime, enjoy his best quotes ever...

10. "A poet can survive everything but a misprint."


9. "A man can't be too careful in his choice of enemies."


8. "Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same."


7. "Illusion is the first of all pleasures."


6. "Life is too important to be taken seriously."


5. "No man is rich enough to buy back his past."


4. "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go."


3. "The only way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it."


2. "Alas, I am dying beyond my means."


1. "I have nothing to declare except my genius"


The last quote is spot on of Oscar Wilde. He was a genius and his epigrams have always inspired the world and novelists. An incredible writer.

Sunday 11 December 2011

10 Best Coldplay Songs

Anyone see X factor? Yeah, Coldplay blew me away as well! My favourite band, that's for sure! I've always thought about my favourite Coldplay songs but I can never really pick, I find myself split between 4 or 5 that I really love. Now, Coldplay aren't the most popular band and have had their critics but I think everyone has a soft spot for some of their more classic songs. Even their new album, songs like Paradise and Princess Of China really get to me on a musical level, so here's my top ten. Enjoy!

Ok, ten minutes later, i'm stuck...I've shortlisted it down to 14 songs which are some of my personal favourites excluding some of the less popular songs. So, change of plan, i'm going to do a top 10 list with a special mention to 4 songs which will be joint 10th :D

10. Don't Panic, Trouble, Easy to Please, The Hardest Part & In My Place

5 Incredible songs and definitely songs that could have appeared elsewhere in the top 10. I have all of these on a par however, the boldness of In My Place as a track is incredible and deserved to be here. Perhaps one people may be surprised at is Easy to Please but in my opinion it is an incredible song with some deep lyrics that showcase Chris Martin's voice beautifully.

9. Violet Hill

A truly outstanding song from Viva La Vida. In my opinion it is inspired, especially the end part where it slows down and relaxes itself. I think the album Viva La Vida really brought attention back to the other band members. Some of the guitar rifts and drumming is really incredible.

8. A Rush of Blood to the Head

Inspired the album title and is, in my opinion, about the speedy rise to fame after the 1st album. I think the lyrics are incredible in a song that appears to be slow but then suddenly bursts to life in amazing fashion. Top tune!

7. Viva La Vida

What a song! I've listened to this song hundreds of times and it always seems to spark some new idea in my head. This song really was the highlight of that particular album of the same name.

6. Politik

Some may argue that this doesn't deserve top ten status, but for me this is an incredible song that seems to unite the band in a way that i've never seen before. For some reason I get the image of being suspended in space when I hear this song, really incredible.

5. The Scientist

We all knew it was coming and this song used to be in my top three. For some reason it has fallen out of the medals but it's not that it isn't a great song. No! It's more the fact that I feel there are better songs. However, the scientist is probably the most iconic.

4. Paradise

The lyrics really are something to behold and the rifts surpass a lot of the rifts i've heard in other songs. Just misses out on the top three but is by far the best song on the new album.

3. Clocks

A total classic, the song is inspired and for some reason the song is made by the long 'ooooooooooooo' bit. I love it.

2. Yellow

Such a simple song but one with so much emotion in. A way we all feel about someone, I feel that this is a really universal song and that is why it's in 2nd place for me.

1. Fix You

How weird is it that this song just came on my shuffle as I started to write this...odd...but meant to be quite clearly. The song is so raw, Chris Martin described this song as 'naked' and is just that. It is pure musical joy and talent with some incredible guitar and some falsetto that just amazes me.

I found it hard to make a top ten for Coldplay and I feel there are some other songs which could quite easily have broken into the top ten. I love all of their songs but I feel I have to mention a select few: What If, Animals, Up in Flames, Propekt's March, Square One, Speed of Sound & Warning Sign. All of those songs and many more mean so much to me. I felt compelled to write this list and hope you enjoy it too.


Saturday 10 December 2011

10 Most Influential People of the Century

I'm talking about all those people who influenced history between 1900 and the year 2000. The century has been described as the most progressive in terms of technology and Science but which people have had a particular influence in history? There are many but i've narrowed it down to 10 people, many of which have won the Person of the Year award at some point in time over the last century.

10. John Lennon
Tragically murdered on the 8th of December, 1980. He and his mates revolutionised the music industry, they changed the way music was played but John Lennon in particular was a stand-out character in the Beatles. With hits like 'Imagine' I think it's fair to say he really did make a difference with his music.

9. Henry Ford
Not a leader or politician, a industrialist who is best known for inventing the car. The car is an essential piece of technology in today's world and the fact that this man invented it and founded 'Ford' rightfully, grants him a place on the top 10 list of the Century.

8. John F. Kennedy
He was criticised for the way in which he handled the Cuban missile crisis but was definitely influential in the whole of the world. His charismatic nature and prowess allowed him to be a leader of people at a time when a war between the USA and the Soviet Union seemed imminent. Tragically murdered in suspicious circumstances, one of the most talked about people in history.

7. Johan Cruyff
Dutch footballer. He changed the way football was thought about, he changed the way football is played today and most importantly was an incredible success on and off the field. In terms of what he did for football I couldn't leave him off the list. A contender for one of the best footballers ever, perhaps, not as good as Pele or Maradona but neither of those two changed football as much as Cruyff.

6. Adolf Hitler
He re-built the German economy but is horrifically known for his major part in WWII. He has influenced history as we know it and is by far one of the most recognised names in the world. 

5. Sir Winston Churchill
The last standing man against the Axis power in WWII. He was elected half way through the war and was an iconic figure for the rest of the world. Not only was he well spoken and witty but he was a man who would never give up in a time when the world needed a man like Churchill. Also named the man of the half-century.

4. Joseph Stalin
The man who helped to rebuild the Soviet Union directly after WWII and was a major player in the advancing years after the war. I put him above Hitler and Churchill because of the longevity of the cold war and the influence it had on technology as both countries provoked the technology boom after the war.

3. Mahatma Gandhi
A man who helped in the effort for Civil rights in South Africa and also an iconic leader in India. He has helped India gain independence as  a country and simply is one of the most iconic figures in history.

2. Franklin D. Roosevelt
32nd President of the USA. He led the USA through a time of economic crisis and world war. He promoted certain beneficial legislation in the USA and gave China and Britain massive financial support in the war. He had a huge role in ending WWII.

1. Albert Einstein
I don't think anyone beats Einstein. The greatest scientist ever perhaps? He is best known for changing and surpassing old ideas within science. His theories of special relativity and relativity are infamous and he has changed we see the world. Not only that but he was a very philosophical man, an incredible person who has offered wisdom to the world. 

Friday 9 December 2011

10 Most Amazing Pictures Taken

I've decided to dedicate my last two posts to some sort of media (including this one) and that is because I have genuinely been influenced by what I have seen on the internet recently. Pictures, videos, and films. All are incredible formats that allow us to experience in some way what others have experienced and documented. I want to share with you some of the photos that have defined events and generations. Enjoy!


10. The lone standing house in the picture is the only house
that remains after Hurricane Ike. Truly an amazing picture
and one that defines such a destructive natural phenomenon.













9. This is a picture of a storm. Is anyone else remembering the movie war of the worlds?













8. I really want to know why a polar bear is in the middle of that field...and why he appears to be clapping? Either way, the contrast in this photo is incredible.









7. I remember this in the news. Truly an incredible image of a man's protest against injustice.
















6. A tragic image. The twin towers. The photographer who took this picture was killed when the second tower fell, his body was found and his camera returned to his wife. She gave the camera to a friend of the photographer who was of the same occupation and he published the photos.







5. Simply a wow photo.













4. Caught licking an ice cream or the eccentricities of a genius? A priceless photo.















3. Incredible wildlife pictures really do bring out the beauty in this world, even if this bug is one ugly looking dude.








2. Never forgotten.













1. A Buddhist monk burning himself to death in protest.











I hope you've seen something in these photos, which one is the most iconic, which is the best? Comment below.

10 Most Inspirational Videos On Youtube

Okay, so i've been browsing Youtube and a trend started to develop between the videos are inevitably started watching, these were inspirational videos...and cats doing funny things but more the first one I said ;). After watching way too many videos to count I decided to pick a top ten out of the most motivational videos I could find, since then, I decided to write this post. I hope you find these videos as inspiring as I did when I was in a low place in my life. Enjoy!

10.  'Maybe, the most inspirational video ever...'
I cam across this video and felt compelled to watch it, i'm so glad I did. It's one of those videos you have to sit and watch all the way through, I mean it's only a couple of minutes long but you feel a sense of pleasure after watching this video. Solidly, within the top ten for me.








9. 'A must see motivational video!'
Personally, I don't like the music in the background to this. But, if you take that out of the equation you are left with some of the most inspiring quotes ever muttered amongst the intellectual elite. Quotes from Einstein and Co. really do have a way of making sense to everyone, and anyone with hair like Einstein needs to be listened to, let's face it.










8. The Cinematic Orchestra - To Build A Home
Over 15,000 likes?!? It takes a couple of seconds to kick in but please listen to the song, the lyrics, it's incredible. I love this song, when I first saw this guy sing this song, I was just in awe. Such an inspiring voice, this song makes you want to appreciate the world.






7. 'The most inspiring video you will ever watch!'
This may just look like a fat man at first but whilst watching this video you realise this guy is more than just a man. He is an un-sung idol in my opinion, an example for many to follow and there's no better choice than the choice of Coldplay - The Scientist playing in the background. Incredible...






6. 'Most inspirational video ever'
When I saw this video I thought it was going to be one of those personal, sad stories which don't really get to you as much as they should. Well, I was wrong, yes, a sad story but transformed into pure inspiration. This is how we all feel about someone in our lives, some of us are lucky enough to have a number of people we feel this way about but I suppose this video is about appreciating what you have when you're lucky enough to have it.








5. 'The most inspirational video you will ever
see Nick Vujicic'
Wow, simply wow. I first saw this video when I was at school, it was an assembly that changed my view on life, I would thank this man if i could. This man is incredible, this man has incredible mental strength and most importantly is happy with life. He is changing the lives of others who think they are worthless. A true inspiration.








4. 'Susan Boyle - BGT'
Cat lady? No, Susan Boyle. A performance that even makes Simon Cowell look on in wonder. It just shows it doesn't matter what you look like, if you have a talent, pursue it!










3. 'Motivation -"Be great, powerful beyond measure"- best inspirational video ever'
This is a great video. Timeless quotes from inspirational people and characters from films. Muhammed Ali was one of the greatest talkers in the world of sport and it really shows in this video.



















2. 'The girl who silenced the world for 5 minutes'
The title says it all...

























1. 'The greatest speech ever made'
Charlie Chaplin is a legend in the history of comedy. Who would of thought he would be one of the greatest speakers too, this speech is inspiring and i'm sure the whole world went silent when they heard this beautiful speech.










I spent a long time on deciding my top ten. I hope you appreciate them as much as I do, they are emotional and i'm not going to lie, I shed a tear at one or two but that's not the point...These are all incredible people, do not think of them as a list but as individually people who are as inspiring as one another, and let us all aspire to live by these words and maybe, one day ourselves become inspiring to others.

If you liked this post, tell people about it, the more views I get the more lists I will make. Comments are always welcome :)





















Wednesday 7 December 2011

10 Best Football Teams in the World

One of the biggest debated questions ever in my opinion is who the best football team is in the world and further on from that, who the best footballer is EVER! I'll be doing a follow-up post on that very soon, so keep posted ;). But let's get back on track! As an avid footballer fan and player I feel compelled to share with you my opinion of the top 10 football teams in the world as of December 2011. I'll be leaving out international teams but you can be sure there will be a post soon on the best international teams. But anyway, This is my top ten. Don't agree? Leave a comment if you're brave enough :)

10. Tottenham Hotspurs.

Now this one might cause some debate. I decided to include Spurs because of how much they've improved and although they've been knocked out of the Europa Cup that does not set aside the fact that they're a brilliant team. Spurs are starting to break into the top 4 in England and any team that does that is surely one of the best. Players like Van Der Vaart and Modric make this club a very top club to be at.

9. Bayern Munich.

This is the team to beat in Germany and have dominated the league for years now. Their history is impeccable and have some of the best players in the world at their disposal. Ribery, Robben, and Lahm are world-class players who all would break into the top teams in the world. To not have them on this list would be a crime.

8. Juventus

Okay, why are Juve here? Let me tell you, they are top of the Serie A right now and deserve to be here. The way they've started to play is like the Juve of old and are a defensive dream to behold.

7. Arsenal

They're not the team they were last season and for me struggled to get 7th place in this list. It has to be said that they look like they're on the recovery but at the same time, they need to get some players if they want to stay on this list come next year. Van Persie is on fire and has almost single-handedly kept them on this list for me.

6. Borussia Dortmund

Recently, this team have been on fire. They have improved so much that they do nothing but show amazing team spirit. They have some good players and i've decided to put them above Bayern Munich because I just think they've surpassed expectations over the last three seasons. Definitely a force to be reckoned with from now on.

5. Chelsea

Chelsea are another team that have struggled for form this season, but with the players they have and the quick shifts in management, i'm willing to give them the benefit of the doubt. I think Chelsea are a team everyone fear because of their sheer strength, they will be fighting for the Champion's League and Premiership this season.

4. Manchester City

I had to find a place for them somewhere on this list. I hate them, but they're good. Silva has been iconic for this team so far this season and throw in Aguero and you have one destructive team. Not only have they spent vasts amount of money but they've gelled as a team and top the Premier League so far this season. I have to give it to them.

3. Real Madrid

Still an incredible team and any team with Ronaldo in has to be in the top 3. What can I say about Madrid?!? They're just so good to watch and pretty much the only team in Spain that can go toe to toe with Barca.

2. Manchester United

Just! I have to say 2nd, 3rd, and 4th have been extremely tight. i mean how do you pick between them? I have to say with United, although, they're in 2nd place in the league, it's just something they do every season. They always seem to be at drift from the league but always come back like a train thundering through the UK. My favourite team and a team that always grind out results and play a bit of football when they need to ;).

1.  Porto...No wait, Barcelona

Barca are by far the team to beat in the world. Messi and Xavi have been recently nominated in the Balon d'or and there are so many more in that team who are world class. Due to their incredible youth system they've churned out some incredible players and an incredible team. I didn't think this team could get better after winning the Champion's League...again! But with the addition of Fabregas, they look incredible.

So, that's my top 10, i'm sure there's a lot of debate about my selection...5 English teams? ;) Yes i'm English but tell me 9 teams that are better than Arsenal. Hope you agreed with the majority. Same time next year? Maybe? How about half a year, i'll review the list ;).

10 Best Things to do Before You Kick It

A slightly different list than usual. This won't be so much funny but definitely a list that needs to be on any top ten website. Worth a read and also very much worth doing all the things on the list if you have to money and time. If you don't have those two things...you can always dream, like me :D

10. Swim with dolphins.

I think everyone wants to try this, seeing all those happy faces on videos you see when people swim with dolphins. It's probably the closest you'll come to swimming with sharks as well...not recommended!

9. Firewalking...

Yes, walking on fire is becoming increasingly popular. The idea is taken from certain religions and monk exercises as they see walking on fire as an empowering experience. The theory behind this is that if you walk quickly enough the hot coals won't burn your feet or leave your face glowing like a peach! Certain material are used as their heat threshold is not too extreme.

8. The great wall of China.

Anyone who says they've walked it is a liar! No one can possibly walk that far but some people like to do parts of it. As far as I know, this wall is the only wall you can see from space, seems like something special to be a part of.

7. Fly a fighter jet.

Extreme speeds and shitloads of adrenaline. Some people do this as a job! Evil Kenevil lives in all of us. A must on the list of things to do.

6. Climb mount Everest...

Or at least a part of it. It seems steep, and it most definitely is!

5. Visit the Amazon rainforest.

The atmosphere is meant to be one of the most surreal things; dense forest, unbearable humidity, and amazing animals. Whatever you do, take a guide with you or you ain't coming back.

4. Invent a cocktail.

For all you alcohol lovers out there (so, everyone!) inventing a cocktail isn't quite what you would call a spiritual experience but who cares! To make your own cocktail and get smashed on it must be a great experience.

3. Run a marathon.

Doing this for charity must be a good feeling to know you've raised money for less privileged people by running yourself ragged.

2. Meet your favourite celebrity.

Imagine meeting the person you idolise more than anyone else in the entire world. An experience that is different for everyone and therefore, my number 2.

1. The final frontier...

Yes, It's finally possible, the public can travel into space for 10 minutes for a small fee...by small fee I mean hundreds of thousands of pounds...but even so, an experience which is truly out of this world...excuse the pun.

Any that i've missed off? Post them and see what others think :)

10 Funny Things to do on the Train

Ok, so we've all been on those long, tedious train journeys to a distant place; maybe work, school, or to see that grandparent who for some reason lives really far away. Well, below is a list I have compiled of the ten best things you can do to kill time on the train. Enjoy!

10. Try and wake up the old guy sleeping.

There's always a busy cabin where some old guy is trying to catch some shut eye before he reaches his destination. If there's more than one of you, turn this into a game. Whoever, wakes him up wins a smartie!

9. Do as much as you can before the guy wakes up.

A play on from number 10. This is an even better game, preferably find someone who is on their own so no one else can see you, and do as much as you can before he wakes up. If you have a pen, draw on his face, If you have rubbish, place it on his head. If you have balls, rub them on his face etc. etc.

8. Mooning people at the station.

You have to wait for everyone to get on who plans to get on the train or you might get hurt. But once they're all on, place that moon of an arse flat against the window and watch as the people recoil in horror to find that you have drawn a face upon your behind and smeared it against the window.

7. Accusations.

Let me explain. Sit next to people on a busy train and after about five minutes shout out 'can you stop doing that please? I mean seriously, stop touching my leg!'. It's a great game if you can keep a straight face. My personal favourite is, 'No sir, I will not follow you to the toilet and engage in relations'.

6. Fake reading.

Take a book on the train. No! Not to read, to use as a prop. Sit next to someone 'reading' your book and once they're not looking put your face really close to theirs and stare. As they turn to look at you quickly go back to reading your book intently. And then the most important step...repeat.

5. 'I don't like you...'

Sit next to someone and slowly turn your head to look at them, when you catch eye contact slowly say the words 'I don't like you...bad things happen to people I don't like'. Then casually turn back to look forward but stare at them through the corner of your eye just to scare them.

4. The terrorist.

Ok, now this is a strong contender to be further up the list. Wear a fake, black bushy beard, get a strong fake tan, and wear a turban. Sit next to people and occasionally say the word 'BOOM!' really loudly and giggle to yourself. Be careful not to get arrested.

3. The reader.

People usually take books on the train. Find those people! peer over their shoulder and begin to read their book or newspaper aloud in a deep tone. This game's brilliant and always provokes a different reaction.

2. Ticket dodger.

A great game, when you see the ticket man call out for everyone in the cabin to show their tickets. Quickly get up and move quickly in the opposite direction from where he is while glancing back with panic on your face. Most likely he will follow you. Once you get to the end of the train he will have cornered you, when he asks for your ticket, produce your ticket and show him, casually sit down and watch his confusion.

1. Eat beans, egg, and curry before you get on the train.

Toot up a storm to cause utter distress for your fellow passengers. Simple.

These are all great things to do on a train, some of them may get you arrested or hurt, so use with caution and don't say I didn't tell you so!

Tuesday 6 December 2011

Top Ten Reasons to be a Guy

Now there's a lot of guys out there who think that women rule their lives and are very hard to handle so I thought i'd make us all feel a little bit better by making a list of our best attributes.

10. Movie nudity is virtually always female.

Even if it's just a casual bit of side boob, we always get the better deal when it comes to acting nudity. Men just usually take their shirts off in movies and I do that at home by myself...not so many women do.

9. We can open our own jars.

I'm pretty sure there are no women living on their own that i've ever heard of. The reason is probably because of lack of sustenance from being unable to open jars.

8. All our orgasms are real.

No pointless sex of any kind, we always get to our climax no matter what we're fucking. It's a great asset, I mean would you rather pleasure a woman but never reach climax or keep things how they are...

7. Nobody secretly wonders if you swallow.

How many times do men stare at women and secretly think while casually glancing at their boobs as they talk, 'I bet you're a swallower!'.

6. Pissing in public.

This is not technically aloud but if there's a bush in the park and no one's around then why the hell not! Especially after a night out I find a good public urination is exactly what I need to help the kebab go down.

5. Monday night football.

Mondays are shit, let's face it after a relaxing weekend we're greeted with work and the only thing that I look forward to on mondays is monday night football.

4. The release of gas is socially acceptable.

I'm sorry but women must do some serious internal damage when they don't release just a molecule of gas! Releasing gas is needed for all people, how else would I finish a curry?

3. Shaving anywhere below your face is pointless.

I don't know where women find time to shave their legs...

2. Phone conversations are kept to a bear minimum!

Anymore than 30 seconds and you're rambling...no man likes listening to a rambler...

1. We think the idea of punting a small dog is funny.

Bet you weren't thinking this would be number 1, heh! All of these are great reasons to be a man but if you're a woman who is reading this and feel offended, well, our lives wouldn't be complete without you and this top ten list would be redundant if women didn't exist. Either way, seeing someone punt a small dog is funny. :D

Top Ten "Would You Rather's"

Okay, so we've all played that game when someone asks you "would you rather" and whoever came up with the best one was always recognised as a leader of the 'would you rather' sessions. So what are the best ones? Well, i'm going to try and compile the list here for you now. As always this won't be serious and i'm just going to post funny ones, so yeah, enjoy!

10. Would you rather be attacked by an angry piranha or by a giant snake?


9. Would you rather eat 30 pounds of cheese or drink a gallon of peanut butter without water?


8. Would you rather fight Mike Tyson at his peak or talk like him for the rest of your life?


7. Would you rather be stuck on a raft with a over enthusiastic Star-Trek fan or a constipated clown?


6. Would you rather be deaf or blind?

A classic!

5. Go down on Grandpa or have your Grandma go down on you?


4. Watch your parents shag a 1000 times or join in once?



3. Have sex with a Walrus or never have sex again?


2. Would you rather fondle an over-willing dog or be fondled by a sharp-clawed cat?


1. Would you rather be bummed by your mum with a penis or do your dad when he has a vagina?


None of these needed to be commented upon, all are disgusting but great questions to ask in the would you rather games...Don't feel ashamed if you secretly answered any of the more disturbing ones...I did...



Top Ten Funniest Ways to Annoy Your Co-Workers

Most top ten lists are pointless, but this is one of the good ones, one of the lists you can really use and my God these are some goodens! I'm going to do a descending list so we save not only the best one till last but the one you need the most balls to actually pull off without getting fired and abused.

10. Spam your co-workers with porn-ads.

This one only really works if you have plenty of time. The best way to do it is set up a fake email address to reduce your liability and then just go nuts. If you can throw in some midget porn or she/male porn then you've got one annoying spam bomb to pelt!

9. Come to work sick.

This is annoying if you are just top-of-the-mill sneezing and coughing loudly so people can't really do work, but if you can take it to another level by endangering people's health, then you are a complete legend really. Now this involves effort and you need to spread your germs by getting insanely close to people's faces, and i mean to the point where they recoil in horror...

8. Dancing round your colleagues as they urinate.

This is brilliant as they can't stop mid-stream...no one can, not even Jesus. You can take this one to the next level as well; when your colleague is in the confines of their cubicle casually excreting you can peer over the top and scream at them.

7. Attempting to start a mexican wave...every two minutes.

Have you ever been at a sporting event when this happens? Yeah it's great to take part once but really? Five fucking times?!? This hate for mexican waves is amplified five-fold in the work place as it's highly inappropriate.

6. Take credit for what others do.

Now this can be to your boss or to other workers, you can just pretend you did whatever your colleague has just done. Another way which I would personally like to try is take credit for everything...For example, say you were the man that broke the speed barrier, or say you're the person who ate five hotdogs in one minute...seriously, look it up on youtube now if you hadn't heard...It was me ;)

5. Fall over and exaggerate your pain.

Have you ever seen Family Guy when Peter falls over and hurts his knee? He holds on to his knee and expresses grunts and 'oohs' and 'ahhs'. It's brilliant, not only do you cause genuine worry amongst your fellow workers, but you can blame it on someone too! Imagine the look on their face.

4. Sneak up and scare your co-workers.

Some may find this funny when it's done to them. But how about when they're on the phone? This one works amazingly well if you go to extraordinary lengths to scare people. I mean we're talking about getting up into overhead cupboards and scaring the SHIT out of people. The more effort you make, the funnier it is.

3. Spill liquids on people.

I'm not talking water either. I'm talking coffee, tea, wine...yes take wine in just for this purpose, and do it early on in the day so they have to stroll around the obvious looking like they've been stabbed.

2. Leave a wet fish in someone's desk.

Need I say more?...

1. Take a shit in the middle of the office.

If this is a bit much, do it on their desk instead. This is by far the most lethal thing you can do, especially if you eat mexican food the night before. Take some toilet roll out into the middle of the room, squat down, open up the daily newspaper and just release like a crazy man.

If I had to pick a favourite, I couldn't, all of them are brilliant in their own way. Comment on anymore you think people should try or even better, comment and please tell me you have done one of these! That would be great. Or just post on anything you've done to your co-workers, we're not here to judge ;).

I am the top ten blogger!

I ask myself, what are the most needed websites on the web, I mean the ones everyone goes to just to fulfill their addictions to knowledge? Social networking sites perhaps? No, the amount of bullshit on those sites just distracts you from your search for useless knowledge. Porn sites? Maybe, but seriously, does anyone spend more than 5-10 minutes on those sites and then not feel sleepy immediately afterwards? Well, I'll get to the point before I go off on a tangent. Top ten websites are by far the best, not only do they cause debate, but people feel ultimately satisfied after they reach that coveted number one spot in a top ten list. That is exactly why I'm going to feed you nothing but delicious top ten lists...excluding this first post... :D Enjoy!